selamat hari raya dearest cool people

 Ramadhan has come to an end and it's finally Hari Raya. AHHHHHH. As much as I'm sad to say goodbye to Ramadhan, I'm also excited and super happy to welcome Syawal. Hehe. I'm currently writing this at 12 a.m. all curled up in bed and I must say, 1st Syawal was amazing, as always. I've had such a good day today. Sure, it's not as fun and awesome as it used to be before the pandemic, but the fact that I still get to have fun and feel happy during a time like this is amazing enough, and I'm so thankful for that.

I woke up at 7 a.m. today, showered, and put on my pretty baju Raya. Went downstairs, ate ketupat and lemang and all the usual Raya food, while the TV was airing a live-from-masjid takbir Raya thing. It was cool. Pagi Raya is my favorite time on the 1st day of Syawal. Like I always say, I like the vibes. Then, like every year, we salam Raya and like every year as well, it was awkwardly emotional but I'm glad I didn't cry this year. Cheers to that!!!!!!!! I tried very hard to hold back my tears cause' I don't like crying in front of my family members especially my dad. It's embarrassing. Anyways, after salam Raya we all took pictures, a lot of pictures. Pictures of the family, single pictures, so many pictures. I actually felt really bummed out cause' the 1st round of 'photoshoot' didn't go so good since my pictures weren't nice. Almost felt like abandoning the positivity I had because of that. Just that. LOL. But then I fixed my appearance here and there and had another round of 'photoshoot'. OK this is actually pretty funny to talk about. I sound dramaticcccc. But yes I was finally satisfied with my Raya pics so my positivity was back. Cheers to that too. 

Not gonna lie, my confidence went very very high after some time, that I made so many Tiktoks and self-absorbed videos of myself. A lot. Plus, I got to see my relatives who live in my neighbourhood. My aunt and uncle and my cousins. We had a pretty great time. I do miss my other cousins though, especially this one specific cousin who's the same age as me. We still talk through messages but I miss her so much and I wish I got to see her. She's a fun person and I enjoy talking to her. Oh well. I hope to see her soon.

I actually beraya from the morning til' at night (just in the neighbourhood). It was supposedly exhausting but I barely felt exhausted. In fact, I had soooo much fun. My tudung cooperated as well as my baju so I'm calling it a good day. I'm happy to still be able to celebrate Raya nicely. As much as I'm grateful that I'm one of those who are fortunate enough to celebrate it, it still upsets me to know that a lot of people out there have to celebrate it alone. But that's OK. I hope they still manage to have fun and take care of themselves. I hope they know they're cared about and appreciated by loads of other people out there. 

Hope u had a nice and lovely 1st Syawal, and if u didn't, don't feel bad. I'm sure u did great. If u managed to get out of bed and dress urself up, or eat food, or drink water today, I'm proud of u. U did amazing!!!!!!!!!! Cheer up OK. 

I'll get going now. Au revoir. Selamat hari Raya maaf zahir dan batin everyone!